MSB {34}: In or Out? The Big Mass Question



I got a new dress for My Sunday Best this week!  Lands’ End offers new prints and colors of their fit and flare dress every year, but I refuse to pay full price.  I watch their website like a hawk, waiting to add a new dress to my rotation if they offer the perfect storm of size, color, and price.  And it happened over the 4th of July holiday.  Woot!  I’m one step closer to a closet of only fit-and-flare dresses and Lularoe.  #lifegoals


This was week two of Mass with our new priest from Africa.  (Africa!)  When we had him over for dinner last week, I jokingly mentioned how Moe is finally able to stay in church for most of Mass, which sparked an interesting discussion.  Father was very clear about wanting children to stay in church as much as possible.  He said that the little noises they make don’t bother him, and that it’s only by being in church that children will know that that’s where they belong.

I sheepishly brought up how much I worry about distracting and detracting from the prayers of others around us, but Father sort of waved that off.  Children belong in Mass.  The end.  He was serious.

Ouch.  I’m firmly in camp Take-Them-Out-At-The-First-Peep.  David has always followed the same thought process as Father, though.  It’s actually been a source of tension in our Mass parenting.  In or out?  In or out?  I say out.  David says in unless there’s extreme screaming.


I told Father that we would try it.


So this week we kept Bea in for all of Mass.  She fussed a little, but it wasn’t awful.  (If you happened to be in the pews around us, please do not tell us if it actually *was* awful.  Sometimes a little denial goes a long way.)  Our pew was a sea of movement, but everyone stayed for the whole Mass.  Even Bea’s naked doll baby with the inked-on eyelashes.  (Thanks, Elle, for that classy makeover!)

I did have to say the words, “Peace is done.  Enough peace!” after some decidedly un-peaceful signs of peace.  And Moe had to be told to stop licking the pew in front of us.

There was a moment when David was holding Bea and she dropped the children’s Bible she was holding on the pew in front of us and it made a jolly big thud.  I actually saw people jump around us.  It made me giggle, because it was like a collective call to pay more attention to what was happening.

Even with all that, maybe David was right all along.


We’ll see what next week holds.


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  1. // Reply

    Love it!! So true. What is “loud” anyway?

  2. // Reply

    Love the dress and the cardigan you paired it with! Good buy!
    I’m in Camp “In” too, but I think what has made it infinitely easier is knowing the folks around me are ok with my kiddos… Well, being kiddos. When we were traveling I was much more nervous and inclined to remove at first (ok second… Maybe third ? ) peep.

    That said, I *will* probably have to get a bit more strict with the little dude who’s laying down in the pew has slowly been morphing into laying down on the floor in the pew, to laying down on the floor close to the aisle, to half-laying in the aisle…

  3. // Reply

    I’m totally impressed. Theoretically, I think toddlers should stay in for the most part, but I’ve never had one (until maybe now) that could remotely come close to staying in. Mine just scream so much! Also, we’ve never sat as a family and we find the attempts last mere seconds because the children are all super distracted by each other, which makes my husband and I sad. Right now, my 10-year-old is serving, my 8-year-old just loves to sit alone in the front pew and reverently participate in Mass, I sit at the back with the 6- and 4-year-olds, and my husband sits at the back on the other side with the 23-month-old.

    1. // Reply

      TThomas and Bea are at such a tricky Mass age– ready to forge their independence but complete irrational about how that looks. Whatever works to survive at this point is the perfect solution!

  4. // Reply

    Oh yay, I’m so glad staying in the church went well! I kind of have to deal with the little noises, because there’s nobody to stay in the pew with the older kids once I have to take the baby out! And I returned to them going through my purse a few weeks ago so… I’m trying hard to stay in until at least Communion!!

  5. // Reply

    I am all for staying in as long as Mary Rose isn’t screaming, but my husband wants me to take her out as soon as she makes more than two peeps in a row.
    Love the new dress! It is very pretty. Your #lifegoals are very similar to mine! 🙂

  6. // Reply

    I’m generally in the stay-in-pew camp, where all my kids usually do much better than being distracted in the cry room. However, that always leaves the opportunity for that wonderful day when your two year old says, very loudly, “pee, peeeeee!” usually during Consecration….

    Anyway, lovely new dress and wishing you quiet Sundays!

    1. // Reply

      So funny! (When it’s not my kids.) Hope you have quiet Sundays, too. 🙂

  7. // Reply

    I’m so glad you posted this! Little man and I attended daily mass this morning, which I’ve only done twice with him ever. As you know, there’s much fewer people in attendance at daily mass. I was in a constant battle of stay in-take him out; quick shove in the Paci or not. We had some say hello and mention how well behaved he was…I had to chuckle as I was sweating after that 30 minutes that seemed like more of an hour. You made me feel better about staying in and battling through it 🙂

  8. // Reply

    (Catching up on my blog reading from being out of town so much, sorry this is way late!) I’m totally one that stays in the pew until there is screaming or a kid is upset and I know he’s about to blow. And then I go back to the pew as soon as they’ve calmed down. I really think we feel like our kids are being louder than they really are…it never fails that on the days I feel like my boys were so loud, several people come up to me and insist that “Your boys were so good!!” Funny how that works.

    1. // Reply

      God bless the church ladies who tell us our kids have been good at Mass. It’s the only time a little white lie in a church is okay. 🙂

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