7 Quick Friday Funnies
It’s been a topsy-turvy week of getting behinder and behinder with another trip to Mayo, getting my stitches out, and swim therapy. So here are some quick funnies from life with the kiddos.
1. Some questions are best left unanswered.
Me: (working in the kitchen, noticing the Bea chomping on something) What’s the baby eating?
Elle: (not looking up, seated next to Bea) I don’t know, but it made her burp!
2. Alabama is the latest victim of fake news.
At co-op, Cee is working on learning about the states, including memorizing their capitals. Seeing that Alabama was coming up on the co-op schedule, I decided to be proactive while we were in the car. A captive audience is a learning audience, after all!
Me: Do you know the capital of Alabama?
Me: Hey! You know that song Oh, Susanna? We could use that to memorize the capital!
Me: Oh, I come from Alabama with a BURNING HAM on my knee.
Me: The capital of Alabama is Birmingham. Get it? “Burning ham” sounds like “Birmingham.” Now you can use that song to help you remember the capital of Alabama!
David: I’m pretty sure the capital of Alabama is Montgomery.
Me: Are you sure?
David: Pretty sure.
Me: Okay, kids. Actually it’s Montgomery. What’s the capital of Alabama?
Me: Actually, I was wrong. It’s Montgomery.
Kids: Oh, I come from Alabama with a burning ham on my knee…
Me: (Sigh) And they let me teach children.
David: Sorry. I didn’t know where you were going with that until it was too late.
3. Is there ever a situation where “yes” would be a good answer?
Moe: Do you want to smell my shirt?
4. What kind of weird camp…?
Me: Tell me about that book you’re reading.
Cee: Well, apparently there are these consolers who take care of people at camp.
Cee: You know, they stay in the cabins and help the kids.
Me: (huh?!?!) Okay. Actually it’s pronounced “counselors.”
5. Ask Bea no questions, she’ll tell you no lies.
Me: Why is your head sticky?
6. On the fine art of getting what you want.
Me: (lecturing the kids as I wash grapes) Blah, blah, blah, blah.
Kids: (patiently enduring lecture as they wait for grapes)
Me: Blah, blah, blah, blah. Do you understand?
Moe: (while the girls nod obediently) No.
Moe: (hurriedly) Do we get grapes if we understand?
Moe: (slowly and penitently) Yes. I understand.
7. A new sport!
Moe: (running and jumping around, seemingly at random) I’m doing gymbaskets!
Me: (not correcting him, because “gymbaskets” will be replaced with “gymnastics” soon enough)
Thanks to Kelly for hosting!