Carrots recently posted all the thoughts on the tough job of being a mother in today’s world. Here’s a thought that’s going to stay with me:
Maybe we are not super heroes. Maybe we are not robots. Maybe just maybe we are human women who need good food, exercise, occasional silence, friendship, a night out, a creative outlet, help with the housework, and to finish JUST ONE cup of coffee before it gets cold in order to feel like thriving human beings.
Sometimes all I want to do is pee alone. Sometimes I resent the fact that Moe (3) will start sobbing uncontrollably if I go to the grocery store alone. Sometimes I am jealous that my husband gets to feel successful. And he pees alone.
(I feel like I need to add the disclaimer here that I love my kids dearly and treasure my time at home with them. That’s not the issue. The issue is being the best version of myself, and that is going to take some work.)
I think part of my issue is not feeling successful. Back in the day, I was SOMEBODY. I was president of stuff. I was a leader. From working at the library during high school, to being a manager with Fine Arts Programming in college, to teaching after graduation–I did good work and was re
cognized for it. It feels good to be admired. To solve problems. To finish projects.
Ain’t nobody admiring my elastic waist pants and mom pony. No one can see that I just finished reading Henry and the Clubhouse out loud to my kids. Or that my kids had lasagna with roasted-squash noodles for supper. Roasted. Squash. Noodles. All they see is the harried-looking mom who is buying ice cream to eat in the closet. Again. It isn’t all about outside approval, but it IS about being proud of who I am.
Okay. I’m motivated. Here are 5 things I am going to do to fight momsolation this week.
- I am going to stop telling my husband that I wish he had a good wife. (Yes, I’ve done that. Yes, it’s dumb.)
- I am going to shower first. Before making the kids breakfast. They will not starve, though Moe will think he will.
- I am going to wear elastic free pants all week. And an accessory that is not the baby wrap.
- I am going to call, on an actual telephone, a mom friend. Not sure about what yet. That’s okay. I’m good at awkward.
- I am going to go to adoration. Alone.
What are 5 things you can do to meet your needs this week?
(Here is the followup to how my week went after working on these 5 things!)
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